Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Baby Love

So this is the second time I have read this book by Rebecca Walker.  I re-read it because I loved this book.  Rebecca has an amazing voice and her story resonates with me.  This time it gave me some of the same thoughts, feelings, and emotions as last time, but this time I had some new ones as well.  I found this very interesting.

You see, like Rebecca and millions of other girls and women around the world, I have always wanted to have a baby, well, not so much baby, but a family.  I want the husband who will love me and our children. I want that kind of family.  The family that opens gifts on Christmas morning together and has evening dinners together.  I've always longed for this.  So far, I have not achieved this, but I am not giving up on this dream and I am not settling either.  However, I do think I am getting closer to this dream of mine.

So this book reminded me of some of my fears of having a baby.  First of, how do you know when the right time is?  How do you know when you are both ready for the added responsibility, albeit joy as well, of a baby?  Secondly, am I willing to give up my time, my energy, space, my tv and film time, money, and sleep for a baby?  I mean seriously, how do people do it?  At this point in my life, I am not so sure.  My third concern is related to healthcare.  Could I have a baby in Nigeria?  If not, can we relocate our lives to the states temporarily for a child?  I don't think I could manage doing all that by myself and wouldn't want too.  So if our jobs and life was in Nigeria, could I do it here?  How would the  carrying of a baby affect my health?  Will I ever be able to lose the weight?  Yes, these may seem like silly fears to some, but they are my fears nonetheless.

But I have many reasons why I want to have a baby someday.  I don't think I really need to list all of these because I think they are all quite obvious.  Anyway, I recommend Rebecca Walker's memoir of having a baby to anyone who's had a baby, wants to have a baby, or would just like another perspective on a female issue...

I love this book.  It's one of my favorites.  I rarely re-read anything, so, that should say something.

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